Chopper Customization Demo at Testosterone Festival

Homebrew Demonstration by Austin Homebrew Supply

Our poker games rarely get more than a few guys ready to give us their money at the table. But a good buddy brews his own beer and his poker games are packed with guys eager to drain the latest keg in a converted refrigerator in the garage. This buddy makes a weekly pilgrimage to Austin Homebrew Supply on Burnet Rd. in Austin.

JB at Austin Homebrew Supply is the king of homebrew in Central Texas - part bartender, part connoisseur, and all mad scientist, JB will bring his beer wisdom and beer making stuff to the Featured Event Stage of the Texas Testosterone Festival to demonstrate how homebrewing is done for the novices, and how it can be perfected for the experts.

Bring your notepads, questions, and palate to The Texas Testosterone Festival Saturday August 15 and show up when the doors open at 10:00 AM for your own beer pilgrimage. And quick note - the Cash Bar, presented by DWIDude.com, will be open and serving when the Festival doors open - so you can get in the… mood.

Classic Car Show at The Testosterone Festival

Just when you thought The Texas Testosterone Festival couldn’t get any better, we suckerpunch you where it counts with an announcement like this one. Sames Red Barn Motors Presents The Classic Car Show at The Texas Testosterone Festival Saturday, August 15 AND Sunday, August 16.

Car enthusiasts throughout Texas will want to check out the awesome collection of Classic Cars curated by the team at Sames Red Barn Motors and Sames Auto Group, Texas’ oldest dealership and, if we may say so, the best and friendliest used car dealer in the lower 48. Sames Red Barn Motors is conveniently located on Slaughter Lane just West of IH-35 and has been family owned and operated since 1910. Additional locations are in Corpus Christi and Laredo.

“We have some amazing vehicles picked out for the Show,” says John Sames. “Texas has a proud tradition of classic cars and Sames Auto Group has been selling those cars for nearly a century. This collection will be a living presentation of great automobiles that represent Texas as well as the history of our Sames dealerships.”

Bikini Guru on… Getting Your Girl the Sexiest Bikini Possible

Resident Bikini Guru Amy Pitre of SugarBaby Swimwear gives us her advice on sexy bikinis from the female perspective.

1. The sexiest bikinis find a way to bare a lot but there are some that bare (curse us for admitting this) too much. Where is the line?

Amy of SugarBabySwimwear.com: The line is drawn inside the woman’s head - it’s what she sees and feels when she checks out herself in her bikini in the mirror……And guys you know there’s no telling WHY, WHAT , WHERE or HOW that line is drawn……

My personal pet peeves are unkept bikini lines, bikini bottoms that are too loose, therefore sagging like a dirty diaper, or strings not properly tied, or not tied tight enough……

Tan lines, not so bad…..Tan lines can be sexy sometimes……

2. Is there any correlation between the bikinis guys like to look at and the bikinis that are comfortable for a woman to wear?

Amy of SugarBaby Swimwear: I see guys checking out bikinis displayed on mannequins in the mall all the time, so that answer would be - Nope, don’t think so……

3. How does a guy buy his wife or girlfriend a bikini as a surprise that will motivate her to get or stay in shape?

Amy of SugarBaby Swimwear: Ok, as surprise or motivation, I would start in the beginning of the first quarter of the year. Get something new, bright, in her favorite colors. (Refer to the guide in question #4). This will give her enough time to get “BikiniLicious” for the summer.
Oh, and it always works to throw a deadline with it. For example, tell her you got this great bikini for her to debut her hot bikini body at some exotic destination you’re taking her to. There’s no better motivation than that! Believe me…..And don’t just take her down to Barton Springs or the neighborhood pool for all her hard work……Although Devil’s Cove by Memorial Day Weekend is always a big motivation for lots I know……..

4. How do we find her size if she doesn’t already own a bikini?

Amy of SugarBaby Swimwear: This one is tricky…..The Golden Rule when buying a woman ANYTHING she will be wearing on her body is - always err toward the smaller size.

Here’s a guide from a woman’s perspective:
a) If you’re thinking she’s a small, Buy a small….
b) If you’re thinking she’s a medium, Buy a small….
c)If you’re thinking she’s a large, Buy a Small/Medium, or a Medium….Buying a small may upset her a little and make her think you really would rather a smaller woman……Then you’re in trouble. Again.

You can always look at her current bikini size ( I would check more than one suit to gauge a better estimate, or one she wears most)….Just don’t let her catch you rifling through her bikinis, this could raise all kinds of questioning that will be almost impossible to explain your way out of……

5. What bikini have you owned the longest and why?

Amy of SugarBaby Swimwear: I have a blue multi-colored gingham that I bought in 1994…….I’ve saved it all these years because it was the first suit I splurged on and spent a couple weeks on the beach in Fort Lauderdale in it…Good times…..And it still looks great!

Got more questions? I’ve got the answers!

XoXo ~Amy

Sugarbaby Swimwear is an Austin-based start up company owned by me - **Amy Pitre**, career swimwear model turned designer…. I have been in every aspect of the modeling business and an entrepreneur for many years, and if there’s anything I know - it’s bikinis… I’ve been competing and winning bikini contests since right out of high school in my hometown of Lafayette, Louisiana.. attended an official modeling school, where I eventually became an instructor and agent for two years training models and actors, and organizing up to 4 runway shows and photo shoots a week…

SO BE LOOKING FOR HOT A*** SugarBaby bikinis popping up everywhere in July 2009………

(Commerce site, swimwear and apparel launch mid-July —custom orders accepted anytime at SugarBabySwimwear@gmail.com)

Beer Guru on… Kegerator.com

Halfway through grilling season we start to get bored of the tools on hand and begin looking around for ways to accessorize. Since the grill has what it needs we shift our focus to what goes with the grill - beer. Kegerator.com has a whole gamut of unique and interesting tools for serving beer, not least of which is their namesake Kegerator, a miniature refridgerator with a tap so you can slip a keg in and have draft beer.

We asked Resident Beer Guru Patrick Wardrop to look through Kegerator’s offerings and pick out the three things he puts at the top of his wish list.

1. Beer Tube

I’ve never seen one of these before. What a great new way to serve beer. This tube is 100 ounces and keeps the beer inside cold while it sits on the table waiting to be tapped. It would compliment a poker game nicely as long as you position the flop just right. The Beer Tube would require less trips to the tap during a game, and that helps my ROI. At less than $100 if you catch it on sale it should pay for itself within a couple showdowns at the river.

2. Chalkboard Beer Tap Handle

As a homebrewer, I’m always changing up my kegs and, let’s just say that sometimes, after a few beers, my buddies will ask what beer they’ve been drinking has been and, lo and behold, I can’t remember my own name, let alone what’s in my mug. The chalkboard beer tap handle is a cool way to write and remember what’s coming out the tap right below. This would be nice, makes it easy to switch up a keg too.

3. Beer Volume and Temperature Monitor

At less than $10, it’s novel and cheap as well as one of those accessories one might actually need at some point. When friends are coming over and that keg has been in there for a few weeks it’s easy to forget just how much has been drained. This strip monitors what temperature the beer is inside as well as how much is left. Unless you have see-through kegs, you’ll need this. And usually you’ll need it at exactly the wrong moment.

DWI Defense Guru on… Getting Pulled Over

DWI Defense Guru the DWIDude.com (Jamie Balagia) answers some of our questions about how we can judge our level of intoxication without the fancy equipment, what happens when we get pulled over, and what our good buddies the cops are looking for when they pull us over. We drink responsibly when we’re out and we’re planning on driving but we have put DWIDude.com’s phone number in our car and our cell phone anyway. (512) 278-0935

1.How do I know if my blood alcohol level is at or above .08?

DWIDude.com:One way is to go to our website and on the left hand side of the Home Page is a BAC calculator.  The instructions are on the page that you will be taken to once you click on the link.  This is a rudimentary calculation like the police and prosecutors use but it is a close approximation.  For a much better predictor you would have to do a drinking simulation at my office while we drew blood and took breath samples at the same time.  Even then there are deviations that would apply to give a different result than your true BAC.  Not much of answer is it?  That’s because every individual changes in their absorption and elimination factors over a single drinking period and from one drinking period to the next.

A safe estimation is to figure that a “normal”  160 pound male absorbs about 0.020 per 12 ounce beer (Bud, Miller, Coors) and eliminates about 0.015 per hour.  So after drinking one beer per hour an increase in BAC of 0.005 would occur since you are absorbing and eliminating at the same time.  If you increase the amount absorbed then the BAC would be higher since usually the elimination rate stays constant.  (Except that in heavy alcohol dosing situations without eating or an extreme alcoholic person at a high level of intoxication can cause the liver to excrete an enzyme that supercharges the elimination rate.)  A simple example is if you drink three beers per hour (0.06 per hour) for three hours (0.06 x 3 = 0.18) and you eliminate the 0.015 over the three hours (0.015 x 3 = 0.045) you would be at a 0.135 (0.18 - 0.045 = 0.135) and you are going to jail!

2.What are my rights if I am pulled over by the DWI COPS?

DWIDude.com: You have the right to remain silent. Be polite but invoke your right to remain silent, you don’t have to answer any questions.

You have the right to refuse the SFST’s (Standardized Field Sobriety Tests)- the walk and turn, the one leg stand, and the HGN (eye test). You have the right to refuse the breath test! Don’t blow in any machines. You should have the right to leave unless they tell you are under arrest or being detained and then you should insist on having me there as your right to an attorney attached in that circumstance.

3. Why should I refuse the breath test?

DWIDude.com: A - You are already under arrest if you are being asked to blow into the Intoxilyzer 5000.  They do not “un-arrest” you if you blow under a .08

B - How do you know if the reading on the machine you are blowing into is accurate?  Is it error proof? Is it calibrated correctly, is the operator using the machine correctly?  Is the machine detecting other things in your body besides alcohol that is contributing to the “alcohol” reading (yeast, ketones, other interferents, etc.– see the “Intoxilyzer 5000″ section of our website for other factors that may affect a breath test read out).

C - The State gets a “free” expert witness at trial and you may have to hire your own expert at your expense to counter his “bad science”.

4. What are the cops looking for to indicate a person is driving while intoxicated?

DWIDude.com: During the VIM (vehicle in motion) portion of the investigation the officer is watching the vehicle for certain clues to investigate further. The list of clues, or cues, as originally published by the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) is as follows:

Turning with a wide radius
Straddling the center or lane marker line
Appearing to be drunk
Almost striking an object or vehicle
Weaving
Driving on other than designated roadway
Swerving
Slow speed (driving 10 mph or more UNDER the speed limit)
Stopping, without cause, in the traffic lane
Following too closely
Drifting
Tires on center or lane marker
Braking erratically
Driving into opposing or crossing traffic
Signaling inconsistent with driving actions
Slow response to traffic signs
Stopping inappropriately (other than in traffic lane)

You will notice that “speeding” is not one of the listed cues, nor is defective tail lights or license plate lights. In other words, many DWI investigations begin with non-DWI traffic stops.  The DWI investigation then begins due to issues that begin during the Personal Contact phase of the stop. (see the FAQ page of our website to learn what the cops have been trained to look for during phase 2 and phase 3). Our office has enjoyed great success in DWI trials during cross examination by showing that there were no “drunk driving” facts in the case. Many officers have spread the word that it is better to follow the potential “DWI victim” for some distance in order to observe traffic violations that are on the list.  This allows the testifying officer to beef up the probable cause to make and support the actual DWI arrest. Think of thousands of traffic violations that occur each and every day in your city. Add in the odor of an alcoholic beverage and you have the average “Drunk Driving” arrest.

Fitness Guru on… Warm Weather, Working Out Outdoors, and Riding a Bike

Resident Fitness Guru David Lee Nall answers our questions on warm weather, working out outdoors, and snapping back into shape.

1. With the weather getting warmer, do you recommend making adjustments to your workout routine or diet?

David: No, you should train the same year round. But if you are not happy with the way you look in your swim suit you better get to work because you are almost out of time for SUMMER!

2. What’s your favorite workout routine for doing outdoors?

David: Don’t really have a building muscle one but I always love mountain biking or hiking for cardio.

3. If you have been in good shape once before, is it easier for your body to get back to that point or is it the same amount of effort for someone whose body has never been in that good of shape?

David: Yes, it is usually easier when you have been there before. You tend to lose faster and gain muscle easier as well. Kind of like riding a bike, your body and mind remembers even if you haven’t done it in a really long time.

David Lee Nall is a certified personal trainer, certified sports nutritionist and aerobics instructor. David is the Overall Winner of the 2007 INBF Alamo Showdown Classic Body Building Show among numerous other Body Building events.
For personal fitness training or nutrition counseling please visit DavidLeeNall.com for more information.
Email us your questions for David at info@texastestosteronefestival.com.
David Lee Nall is the promoter and lead judge of the First Annual Texas Fit Model Search at the Texas Testosterone Festival. If you are interested in competing please visit our First Annual Texas Fit Model Search Announcement page to download the registration form.

Health Guru On… Fat, Fat, and Stress

Resident Health Guru Devon Hornby responds to our questions about eating fat, not getting fat, and all the damn stress going on.

1. Grilling season has nearly returned although we rarely have to stop here in Texas. There are a number of ground meat recipes we’re really into. What do you recommend as far as leanness of the meat and which meat do you recommend - ground beef, lamb, or pork?

Devon: Ah, meat…I love meat. Honestly I have never given much thought to leanness other than the old, very true, maxim that fat is flavor. My preference, from a health and taste perspective, is lamb. It has real flavor, it is versatile and best of all most sheep still graze on open pastures instead of feed lots. What is so great about that you ask? Not all fats are created equal, and no I don’t mean saturated vs. unsaturated. I mean good old animal fat varies in how good, or bad, it is for you depending on what the animal ate before it got served up on your plate. Pasture raised, that is grass fed, meats are high in healthy omega 3 fatty acids and CLAs (go look it up, I am not going to get into it here (Editor: We did. Click here.). Feed-lot meats, that is almost all the beef you buy at the grocery store, is laden with all kinds of nasty crap most of which you and I cannot spell or pronounce. Just remember why Mad Cow disease spreads (the bovine equivalent of Soylent Green) and then go buy some grass fed beef or lamb. Pork… well personally I think there is a reason that God said “don’t do it man”. The pork lobby is strong so I am going to leave it at that.

2. What are some simple recommendations you have to boost metabolism?

Devon: The best and only effective way to boost your metabolism safely is through proper diet and exercise. Sadly most people trying to lose weight make serious errors on this front. A fast metabolism is more important to losing weight than burning calories at the gym or counting calories at the buffet. Let’s tackle these one at a time. Exercise is an excellent way to boost your metabolism. To achieve this efficiently work out no more, yes I said NO MORE, than once every 36 hours. Keep you workouts to under an hour, around 40 to 45 minutes. Don’t waste time. Work out heavy and hard, relatively low reps with high resistance are the ticket to getting a powerful workout in under the time line. Then make sure you eat at least every four hours but not more than every two. Get plenty of protein and keep the carbs low except every three of four days go for broke on whatever carb source you like and load up. This keeps your metabolism from mistaking your diet for starvation and will keep it in gear. This eating strategy is known as macro-nutrient cycling and is time tested by natural body builder and health guru Mike Faigan. So in short if you want to keep your metabolism geared up eat more and workout less. Go figure…

3. Damn dude. Everyone is stressed. What the hell?

Devon: Yep the stress levels are pretty high these days. If you find you are too stressed out turn off your damn TV. The only thing of any use to your day to day life is the weather and around here they are usually wrong on that front anyhow. You’re an investor you say, well I pity you, but seriously…get the info you need off of your computer and stop listening to the idiots on the box. Do you think a reporter is ever going to come on TV and say hey dude everything is just fine? They are paid to stress you out, so opt out. Beyond that, learn some stress reduction techniques. Breathing exercises are awesome so is some gentle exercise like tai chi. Tai chi is not just for old people, it how those people got to be old.

Devon Hornby has been studying and practicing the healing and martial arts for most of his life. His is particularly interested in traditional methods of maintaining and improving men’s health. He is director of Tao Health Center in Austin, Texas. Go to TaoHealthCenter.com for more information. Email us your questions for Devon at info@texastestosteronefestival.com or directly to Devon at devon@taohealthcenter.com.

Film Guru On… Summer Blockbusters

The weather is getting warmer… actually, that’s a lie. The weather is still unseasonably and miserably chilly.

But we’re dreaming of warmer weather and that has us thinking about sitting in an unseasonably chilly movie theatre to watch the latest blockbusters - which somehow won’t have us miserable like we are now. 

So we reached out to Kelly Williams, Film Program Director of the Austin Film Festival, to ask him “What are the summer blockbusters you are most looking forward to seeing this year?”

1. Funny People

Judd Apatow does his best Hal Ashby impression, but regardless, it should be another solid Apatow film. It seems that there is always a new “Judd Apatow” movie out there, but rare is the one with him behind the camera.

2. Year One

Six words: A New Comedy by Harold Ramis

3. X-Men Origins: Wolverine

This seems more in line with the first two X-Men films, which helped open the door to the current wave of great comic book films. Plus Wolverine is bad ass, we all know that.

4. GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra

I was a kid in the 80s, why wouldn’t I want to see this? Actually, I have pretty low expectations for this one, but I am really curious. I’m pretty sure (like the animated Transformers: The Movie did) the live action will be trumped by 1987’s animated GI Joe: The Movie featuring the voice talent of Don Johnson and the late Burgess Meredith.

5. Land of the Lost

Well, the work of Sid and Marty Krofft is always good for a solid freak out, but you throw Danny McBride and Will Ferrell in there and who knows what you’ll get – maybe a solid adventure comedy, maybe a total bomb. Either way, the best thing that could come out of this situation is more Krofft adaptations!

Kelly Williams has been involved with the Austin Film Festival since 2001. In 2004, he became the Film Program Director at the Austin Film Festival where he programs features and shorts as well as oversees the full scope of the festival’s programming. For more information on the Austin Film Festival please visit www.austinfilmfestival.com.

Beer Guru On… Samuel Adams’ Winter Lager

Winter in Texas is relative. But unlike most of the country, what we consider winter is very nearly over, and that requires a change in our beer consumption. We asked Resident Beer Guru Patrick Wardrop to review one of our favorite winter brews before the season passes and SXSW reminds us, in a flood of free Shiner beer, that Spring has arrived.

Patrick writes of the Samuel Adams’ Winter Lager:

Appearance: Dark reddish amber, good head retention which fades to a thin light head with a little lacing.

Aroma: Slightly sweet with cinnamon or all-spice undertones that produces a very pleasant aroma.

Taste: A slight malty, caramel and cinnamon flavor with a hint of hop bitterness that has a dry smooth finish.

Mouth feel: Medium-High carbonation and medium body that is clean and crisp.

Drinkability: A very drinkable winter brew, it goes great with all kinds of food. I would classify this is as a crowd pleaser most would enjoy.

Serving type: Draft

Conclusion: Overall this a great beer that I would recommend to most, even some non-beer drinkers. It is a very smooth beer that isn’t too heavy for a dark beer (you can drink a few extras and not get full).

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