We Ate the Onions and Yes, We Cried

Former Tamale Eating World Record Holder Levi Oliver and The Texas Testosterone Festival spent a recent Saturday eating raw onion and talking about the experience both to determine the tear-fulness of each onion type as well as to learn a little about the process of training for competitive eating in general.

Two videos were created. We share them here. Please distribute them at will.

A reminder: Come See Grown Men Cry is a competitive eating event to be held at Bikinis Bar and Grill on IH-35 in Austin Sunday, August 9 at 3:00 PM. If you are interested in competing, stop by Bikinis Austin, San Marcos, or the new San Antonio location and consume Bikinis’ Big Buckin’ Burger to qualify.

Come See Grown Men Cry - Competitive Eating at Bikinis August 9

We have one Featured Event that is so powerful in concept and so thrilling in delivery that it couldn’t be contained within The Texas Testosterone Festival and the walls of The Palmer Events Center. ‘Come See Grown Men Cry’ at Bikinis Bar and Grill on IH-35 in Austin on Sunday, August 9 at 3:00 PM. Our special guest will be former Tamale Eating World Record Holder Levi Oliver.

5 Minutes. No Eyeglasses or Noseclips allowed. No Tissues. $200 cash to the real man (or woman) who can eat the most raw onion. Levi will be there to make sure the competition is fair but no one will be there to stop the tears.

To be eligible to compete, visit the Bikinis Bar and Grill in Austin, San Marcos, or San Antonio and consume Bikinis’ Big Buckin Burger. You’ll receive a t-shirt and an invitation to compete in ‘Come See Grown Men Cry’. There will be a limited number of competitors so show up early to register with your invitation. An invitation does not guarantee entry into the competition.

‘Come See Grown Men Cry’ is also an opportunity to register for the numerous competitions and seminars being held the following weekend at The Texas Testosterone Festival. Early registration prices will be available for UFC Ultimate Fighter Amir Sadollah Mixed Martial Arts Seminar, AT&T Presents Relson Gracie Seminar, The Relson Gracie Texas Jiu Jitsu Tournament and Team Challenge, The First Annual Texas Fit Model Search, Zhen Mei Nutritional Products Presents Spartan 300 Challenge by Crossfit Central, Video Game Tournaments by Gamerz in Lakeline Mall, and if you ask nicely, and dress appropriately, we might even consider looking you over for the Bikini Contest by Bikini’s Bar and Grill.

The Fantasy Poker League will be running their regular Texas Hold ‘Em Poker Tournaments at Bikini’s at 6:00 and 8:30 PM so there will be no reason to leave after the boo-hoo is over.

Additional contests and events will be announced or made up on the spot so be sure to catch this great pre-event to The Texas Testosterone Festival.

Taking Back Valentine’s: Gifts for the Alpha Male Food Lover

Ladies do not fret. Despite the fact that we have taken back Valentine’s and you are therefor expected to buy US gifts this year, we are here to help. No matter what type of man you are devoted to - Health Lover, Music Lover, Food Lover, Beer Lover, Football Lover, or Fitness Lover, we have the perfect gift suggestions for you from men who exemplify what it means to be a man - whatever they love.

Alpha Male Food Lover Levi Oliver is the former World Tamale Eating Champion consuming 36 tamales in 12.5 minutes and was the subject of the documentary “Eating Levi”. The dude knows food. And eats it. Fast. We asked Levi for the five gifts he is wishing for this Valentine’s.

5. Take him to a local food challenge.

We all remember that scene from “The Great Outdoors” when John Candy’s character tackles The Old 96er. What better gift than to give your man a chance to get in touch with his inner John Candy via his own epic food challenge experience? If your man is an old hat at this type of thing already, find him a challenge he hasn’t heard of and take him to it as a surprise. On the other hand, if your food lover hasn’t yet taken the plunge into an enormous meal for sport and the closest thing to it that you’ve seen him do is staring longing at the television while competitive eating programs are on, a more subtle approach may be required. Instead of surprising your food lover by challenging him to the Jaun in a Million Don Juan Taco Challenge at brunch on Sunday, like you would an old pro, you would be better off giving him a home-made gift certificate for support in training and the price of the meal if he chooses to take you up on the offer.

4. A Food Movie

For those with Food Lovers for loved ones that don’t want to give them so good a view to the life of a competitive eater, a movie may be better than a food challenge. I always take the time to watch movies I find on television that have competitive eating scenes in them. For example, I’ve seen the movie Beer Fest dozens of times simply because of Land Fill. If you don’t know who I’m talking about, give Beer Fest to your Food Lover this Valentine’s Day, you won’t regret it. Even if your man has seen it as many times as I have, he will still appreciate receiving it as a gift from you. If your Food Lover owns it already, do not worry, there are plenty of suitable alternatives. “Stand By Me” and “Cool Hand Luke” are both terrific movies with mind blowing competitive eating scenes that will leave your man dreaming at night about leaving the likes of Joey Chestnut(1st in the World), Patrick Bertoletti(2nd in the World), and Takeru Kobayashi(3rd in the World) in the dust.

3. A Personal Cookbook

This may sound obvious, but a cook book is an excellent gift for a food lover. Don’t race off to Barnes and Noble and just grab anything off the shelf though. The best way to get away with giving an Alpha Male Food Lover a book for Valentine ’s Day is to A) make it yourself, and B) make it thoughtful. I wouldn’t be pleased with any store-bought cook book because of all the effort involved. Who wants the promise of combing through a strange book for good recipes, future grocery lists and time spent hunched over the kitchen counter cooking as a romantic present? Instead, compile some recipes you know he already likes. Does he often find his face covered in wing sauce at Pluckers? Include a hand-written and personalized page with a specially chosen wing sauce recipe that you tracked down with his tastes in mind. It helps to ask his friends and family, secretly of course, what his favorites are and you’ll have a handful of pages in no time. Bind them nicely and make sure there’s room to add more over time, not unlike you would with a scrap book, and that gift will take up a permanent residence in his kitchen. If your loved one fancies himself a big eater, you might have fun scaling up the recipes so that all of the ingredient’s quantities are for serving lots of people. At the very least you will have given him a present that will forever link his favorite foods with your love in his mind, leaving him thinking of you during his meals.

2. A Kitchen Appliance

Even if your food lover isn’t a wiz in the kitchen a kitchen appliance can be a spectacular gift. I personally don’t know what I would do if I didn’t know that at any moment I could walk into my kitchen, plug in my deep fryer and deep fry a hero sandwich if I felt like it. Do I deep fry everything I eat? No, but the peace of mind that machine gives me, even if I use it infrequently for obvious health reasons, is worth every penny I spent on it and every square inch of space it takes up in my kitchen (I bought the biggest one I could find outside of a restaurant supply store). This year I would prefer a waffle iron, since I already have a deep fryer. Your food lover may already have both of those handy (if not often used) appliances, so do some research, again secretively with his friends and family. Keep in mind, though, this is actually one of those rare opportunities where you can buy a gift for a man with yourself a little bit in mind. Don’t go crazy and get him a vegetable steamer, but if your food lover doesn’t already have a backyard grill of his own, get him one. I’ve seen them for less than $50 at HEB, some assembly required. If he does, get him a smoker. If he’s got a smoker, get him a rotisserie grill, etc. If storage space is an issue, he may get a kick out of an electric knife or one of those fancy Japanese kitchen knives made out of porcelain. Fight the urge to throw this idea out because you doubt your food lover will use it often enough to justify the effort and expense. The cost to benefits ratio of a gift like this one is often much better than it looks.

1. Cooking Classes (For You)

This next gift is actually a bad idea to give directly to your man: cooking classes. On the other hand, signing yourself up for a cooking class is a different thing entirely. Even classically trained professional chefs have room for improvement and a step up in your technique could be just the gift he was looking for. In addition, the improved kitchen technique may make cooking a more enjoyable experience for the entire household. If your Food Lover is your household’s head chef, taking an interest in the culinary arts in order to dazzle him with a few things will make him fall over from love-induced seizures. Don’t forget to keep him from swallowing his tongue as you help to calm him down with stories of meals to come.